Moments Before You Die
by Captain Harkness 4 eva
Summary: What happens as the brave but huanted team reach the open jaws of Death? Who will be there to sve them? And what is so frightneing about Death?  It's said moments before you die your life flashes before your eyes!
1. Chapter 1

**Moments Before You Die Your Life Flashes Before Your Eyes**

**For my JANET (Jack's favourite Weevil)! **

**Taken from the episode Combat, when Janet has been released by Jack and Tosh with a tracer, so that they can follow the people that are taking the Weevils and find out what they are doing with them. As Janet is nearing her death, moments in the comfort and safety of the Torchwood cells fill her mind.**

The Evil within Shines out as Beauty

The blood pumping in Janet's ears was becoming deafening. The sudden rush of adrenaline was running out and replaced by sharp intakes of breath as the chase was persisting. Her speeding sprint regressed into a primitive waddle, her legs began to tire and her arms hung helplessly by her side. Her lungs were struggling with intensity of the chase but the men continued to push on. They were dressed in black and completely masked, they wore a furtive grin where flesh was visible and held sharp instruments which sparked with electricity and made Janet skip in shock and look back for a glimpse of her murders.

The thumping beat, an urgent rush of blood continued to fill Janet's mind and cut out any other sounds. As Janet's feet continued to walk her into Death hands she longed for the comfort of her cell. At least in her cell in the Torchwood base she was not at the mercy of death and was fed well and constantly monitored by the neat gentleman in the suit. He was quiet and quite peculiar; he would always bring her food and check up on her. Janet often observed him through her dusty safety screen, he would look back into her dark and alien eyes and regard her as something lower than him, however he would always be the one to feed her and look after her without complaint and would care for her meticulously as well. She almost feared him as she could not judge him or understand what he might do next. He was unpredictable and Janet felt vulnerable under his watchful gaze, although she suspected he must be under control of a higher command.

The vision of another man filtered through Janet's mind. This man was special though, he was already half in Death's door but he was stronger than Death and only partially in Death's grip. This caused him to have a slight connection with Janet. She had noticed him before down at the vaults and he was unstable at the time, Death had been clawing at his soul and playing with his mind. But he was not to be feared, he was the King of Weevils and his command ruled. It was a strange connection as he was not of Janet's origin but the approach of Death brought them together. This meant Janet could not hurt him like she could anyone else, he was to be respected and all must bow down before him.

Janet remembered the beautiful, calm face of the girl. She had been fascinated in Janet and had wanted to run tests on her and examine her. She wanted to understand her origin and her behaviour. She had been more interested in her cold gadgets and technology but she was the most emotional and far from the emotional detachment of her instruments. She was caring and full of love for her job and passion for discovering more about alien life. She was quiet and peaceful and had a huge admiration for her boss.

Janet's life was chasing in on her faster than life could playback in her mind. She suddenly realised the betrayal that led her to this coming death was down to the beautiful woman and the ever un-faithful leader of them all. That man that had looked at her as if he understood her, he was different from the rest. He was too good in controlling his emotions that no one could understand who he really was. Something obviously bothered him as frequently he left his team behind and carried a face of despair. Janet had seen him die and within a few seconds would be up again and would carry on as usual although his face was pallor and the pain would age his eyes a year more. Janet feared him as this man could never die and was not to be trusted.

Janet's legs were still pacing forward without any thought but as she neared a fenced off area her heart that was already beating fast was beating even faster. Her frantic movements conveyed her panic and her eyes darted all over the place looking for a way out. The fear of dying and what may come next was overwhelming that Janet realised that her silent, clam life in Torchwood vaults was coming to end and eternity of darkness and haunting for evermore to come. But as un-faithful as he may be the tall, broad shouldered man appeared out of a dark, dim alley way. His presence was overwhelming and then the scary men stopped running and panting. Janet's saviour strode out and lengthened and armed hand, gun loaded and cocked. His arm held power and the control to kill was within the movement of pulling a trigger. But the dashing hero just stood there ready without a flinch of panic. The nasty creatures in black halted in sheer shock and fear. They lowered their sparking instruments and backed away a little. The man grabbed Janet by the collar of her uniform and jerked her down the alley way with him. He may have been un-predictable but he had just saved her life and for that she was grateful.


	2. Chapter 2

**Moments Before You Die Your Life Flashes Before Your Eyes**

**For MY IANTO (Always my Ianto forever)! **

**When the toxic gas released by the 456 in Children of Earth suffocates all life in Thames House Ianto is left dying helpless in Jack's arms. Wondering what his life was worth?**

The Tea Boy with a Deeper Meaning

The toxic air filled Ianto's lungs it filtered into his heart and veins, squeezing all matter of life out of his frail body. As the poison filled his body his breathing was becoming shallower and his hands clawed in panic and his eyes widened in horror of his coming death. The clamour of the screaming people petered out as they crumbled to the ground and crawled like rats to food in hope of escaping the prison and captivity of being locked in Thames House until death approached them individually. Death seemed seconds away but the time Ianto spent lying helplessly in Jack's arms seemed a lifetime. Ianto suspected that Death wanted him to suffer and count the minutes until his death, in the arms of his lover who could never die. It almost appeared ironic that Ianto would die so young, with not a single grey hair, let alone a pension. He had barely lived. Meanwhile Jack was over 150 years old, many lifetimes had passed his way and yet he could never die. He knew more than anyone else what it is to be alive and the painful reality of life. He looked on to his lovers graves still carrying the face of a 40 year old but a heart shattered by time.

Ianto felt merely a blip in time. The seconds that ticked away now were precious. But Ianto contemplated on what is the point of living, if all you are is a few precious moments and only a minimal blip in time to your lover. Time passed in silence and sorrowfulness hung in the air, Ianto soon realised that his whole life was worth these few seconds in Jack's arms. As he looked up into Jack's eyes and saw a tear tearing down the side of his face scarring his cheek salty wet, he was reassured that it was all worth it. He lived for these quality moments and nothing else, what was better than this dying in your lovers' arms at the mercy of their soul, making part of their history and making their life whole even though your own life was not. Ianto took the time in these dwindling seconds to utter the words "I love you" although he knew it would not mean much to Jack and that those three words had been repeated time and time again over hundreds of years for Jack's ears to hear. Ianto was just one of the many who had spoken those words and over the years those words had lost their meaning, they were merely three words. But Ianto also understood that those three words could be said too much, but not enough and Ianto spoke these words now in hope that it was enough for Jack to realise he really loved him and would dream only of him as he lay in eternal darkness. Ianto also hoped that Jack would carry these words in his heart through his antagonising infinity to follow.

But little did Ianto know that Jack truly loved him like he had never loved anyone else and to him Ianto was worth the wait of hundreds of years of a wasted life. Ianto had made a difference in Jack's life and made him realise what it was to be human again. Without Ianto in his life he would be dust, lost in space without a meaning for living. Making Ianto happy gave him a goal in life a purpose for his eternity on this planet. But now that Ianto was slipping away from him he had no reason to be living, but he couldn't die. Seeing a grin widen across Ianto's face or a twinkle and wink of his eye reassured Jack that he was making him happy but looking down into his pallid face now, the life running away from his reach, there was no smile and this saddened Jack. As Ianto struggled to ask to be remembered, Jack finally broke, his heart splintered into a million of pieces that he knew would be scattered into the hidden corners of the Universe out of reach. What did Ianto think of course he would remember him, he could never forget him.

Jack was afraid of the pain that would strike him again, he had already lost Tosh and Owen and now Ianto, who next Gwen? Or maybe he would lose himself because Ianto was the one who reminded him of who he really was. That was what scared Jack the most; he didn't know who he really was and that way he didn't know what people loved him for.

Ianto was only just beginning to realise Jack was more than a monster living off the dread of never dying and the idea that he would be the last man standing with no one's shoulder to rest on. What could he do to change that? How could he help his loved one? He knew that he was his only shoulder to rest upon and now that his time had come, he would leave Jack to crumble. Ianto had seen it all before, the Jack he used to know and had first met would be able to stare Death in his face, no matter what and would rise above the graveyard around him. But after Tosh and Owen had died, he had seen a change in Jack. Death had finally won.

Even through a blurred vision Ianto could see the panic strewn across Jack's face, there was nothing he could do for him, where had his cool headed Captain gone? The emptiness of Death called to him and Ianto's soul gave in and was drawn away, a final gasp and he was gone. This time Jack could not save him and it was all his fault, he wanted to cry out and scream but all his emotions had shimmered away with Ianto's final breath. Ianto's body became heavy in Jack's arms but he continued to hold tight, tighter and tighter his hands clawed at the cold flesh, another body lying in his arms, how many more? Out of desperation Jack strained over Ianto's body, brought his tear streaked face to that of Ianto's ghostly face. A lover's last kiss stained Ianto's lips pink. Jack collapsed, the two lovers lay peaceful together in the silence, and Death passed out the door and left the bodies frozen, frozen in a time never to be forgotten.


	3. Chapter 3

**Moments Before You Die Your Life Flashes Before Your Eyes**

**For the Captain's Doctor (there through the toughest times)! **

**Owen may be dead but he is still very much alive and Death will not let him go! Set during Dead Man Walking when Owen keeps finding himself in the darkness with no way out! But he knows more than anyone else what Death is waiting for!**

The One Who Can Heal Others Is Broken

Once again Owen fell into the darkness, the dark deep hole of Death's mouth. He was not falling but he was floating in the infinite loneliness. He was fighting the invisible monster of Death and trying to reach the surface of a bottomless pit to return to the living; where everyone took their life for granted without knowledge of what Death was like, but they lived with the fear that one day they will meet Death and there would be no escaping from him. However Owen knew that it was that fear that Death lived off the scary nightmares and near misses, the monster in the corner of your eye, there at your every turn and blink. Death had a looming presence and in the darkness he was lurking behind Owens' back just out of sight but a constant reminder that Owen was dead!

Owen felt the energy drain from his body slowly dissipating into the darkness. Death was seizing his energy as his body began to falter. Life was so precious but Owen knew that better than anyone else. The desire to live was so strong that it made his head spin wildly. Infinity lay beyond him and there was no one there only someone lurking in the darkness, waiting for him. He had become a doctor in hope to save someone else's life might make his life better in return. But he reassured himself that people he saved had not encountered Death yet. But this also struck a twinge in his heart as he realised that he hadn't saved anyone.

This pulled on stronger sinews of Owens' heart, mirages of Diane and Katie, lovers he had lost in his battle against Death. What was the point in being a doctor if he couldn't save a life let alone the ones he deeply loved? At this rate he couldn't even save himself. Death was begging to play with his mind twisting his thoughts around his little finger. Spewing up forgotten memories, images buried long ago in the deep crevices of Owens' mind. A mix of happy times and sad times rewound in his mind. The rapid life flash back was too much for Owen, he had to sit down. But as he tried to do so he felt he was falling again, he was swimming in the darkness alone.

He remembered, moments from his past. His head resting in the hair of his fiancée, the overwhelming smell of that instantly recognisable perfume filled his nostrils. He breathed in deeply desperately trying to recall the smell. Then he remembered he was dead, he could not smell anything again. He was placing the flowers on Katie's grave, invisible tears streamed down his face; he had no tears to cry. Joining Torchwood, now that he could remember, he would never forget. The excitement he still felt, the thought of a new life still filled his broken heart with joy. Torchwood had changed his life dramatically. Gwen had asked him once if he minded not being a doctor anymore, he chuckled of course he was a doctor he just didn't deal with patients anymore.

Torchwood had thrown up all kinds of miracles and miseries. One of which deeply scarred him. Diane, the mystery pilot, out of time, lost until she found Owen. He loved her so much he was driven mad by her. He reached out to touch her lovely red velvet dress as she danced and swirled that night among the stars. But Owen soon was reminded he could not feel anything anymore and the dress slipped from his grip as well as the image of Diane.

But then there was also Tosh. She had only just told him that she loved him, but Owen had always known that. The way she looked at him and smiled so sweetly in his direction like she did to no one else. He could see her now; her perfect face with neatly shaped hair framing her face and her glasses delicately placed on her nose. She was everything he could never be, hard-working, concentrating and so adorable. The fact was he loved her to; he could just never say it to her even though he knew it broke her heart.

Suddenly Owen had the odd sensation that he was not alone. Something, someone was waiting for him in the darkness. Owen twisted around violently. Spinning and spinning faster he went, dizzier and dizzier. Owen began to scream. He shouted for Martha, the perfect doctor he could never be, Gwen, her charming smile and dashing charisma. Even Ianto he would miss, he would miss them all. Jack, his oh so cool Captain, even though he could be a bastard at times, he would pine for him. As Owen fell out of the darkness he found himself in his arms. He cried and cried, wept and wept. His Captain, always his Captain, he would be there for him like no one else. Owen gripped tighter into the flesh of Jack's arm and screaming "Don't ever let go!"And he knew from the rub on his neck and the ruffle of his hair that Jack never would let go, never.


	4. Chapter 4

**Moments Before You Die Your Life Flashes Before Your Eyes**

**For my oh so Gwen (even if you don't think your like her, you will never see what I see in her, in you)! **

**Gwen's first near death experience as the new Torchwood girl. But will it be her Doctor or her Captain that will be there for her? And who is one she is thinking about as she is about to die? Set during Countrycide!**

The Girl with the Golden Heart

The shot vibrated through the air echoing across all the valleys and hills. The bullet penetrated the skin tearing into it as mould eats away at fruit. Destroying layers of cells one at a time. The pain spread as quickly, travelling up and down the body. Instinctively Gwen reached out her hand for the source of the pain. The squeeze of flesh was satisfying and as Gwen's' eyes fell closed a feeling of calmness fell over her. She had the sensation of being in a deep dark hole that was never ending as she fell beyond measurable distance. There was the absence of life that kept her from tripping and falling off into the dark, wide mouth of Death. But Gwen knew her life with Torchwood would always be on the verge of tumbling over that cliff. In her life with Torchwood death was always present; peering over your shoulder. Death was present in the Hub, the unsettling draft on your shoulders of the intermittent dripping water from the water tower, and not to mention it was always feared by the boss, the man that could never die.

As the ground beneath her continued to disintegrate visions of Rhys passed by her, but they were just out of reach. She remembered the first day they had met and a smile spread across her face at the memory of it. He was such a warm and caring person. His presence in a room made Gwen feel comfortable and she could always rely on him to be there, for her to fall back into his outstretched arms. Her job had often come between them and torn them apart but it had also brought them together. As Gwen lay still in her final moments, blood seeping throughout her clothes, she knew that her job and close contact she had with Death made her value her ever faithful boyfriend more and this in return made their love stronger, as they knew that any day they could be separated between the living and the dead.

Gwen reflected upon her life with Torchwood and her first day there. She had been intrigued by her dashing boss. His mysterious name which did not belong to him and those sharp blue eyes that had seen many loved ones die before him. His face drawn by the hundreds of years living with the constant dread that he could never die and he would have to pain the years of immortality on his own. He drove her crazy and yet he was always there for her a presence in her soul. He was so different from anyone else she had ever known and being with him made her feel safe, or was that just because he could never die and therefore would never leave her side.

Gwen did realise that Jack's eyes were mainly there for Ianto, but she also noticed he took particular interests in Gwen and Tosh and Owen. Gwen could see from the concentrating furrow in his brow and the incline of his head as he watched his team working from his office that he admired them. Jack had also often told Gwen, how he felt that living on this planet. Working in this city, with these people had changed his life. Gwen had changed the ways he did things and saw things and that he would not change that for the world.

Gwen's eyes rolled back into her head, she was still falling and peering down at her was her life. But who was going to be there to save her she saw no one. But now she felt a rough hand stroking her hair and that instantly reassuring American accent. Jack was there to save her, her hero. His voice called out to her "Hold on Gwen, stay with it, for me!"And before she knew it she was being carried away in Jack's strong arms and at that point she knew she would live to see another day. Jack moved her swiftly into the house and had placed her gently on a table. Recent memories came flashing back. Gwen had been with Jack checking a few derelict houses; they had come across a locked door. Gwen had eventually managed to get the door open and in a matter of seconds she was shot and down on the ground.

The impact of the bullet had thrown her violently down on the ground and she had rolled on the ground screaming for a while. Finally the shock of a few drastic seconds passed and the pain kicked and overwhelmed her putting her into a trance like situation. The pain came back to her now and as her eyes strained open she saw Owen. He certainly was quite the witty doctor. But in his care she felt safe again. He was a brilliant doctor and she loved him and he loved her. Gwen went numb after a prick stung her side. She chuckled to herself as she thought about Rhys. He would have a field day if he knew Gwen had been shot. She could vividly imagine him ranting on in a tirade to Jack. But he would never that she saved the world every day in secret and that Death lived on the doorstep of her office. But it was better that way she thought.


	5. Chapter 5

**Moments Before You Die Your Life Flashes Before Your Eyes**

**For sweet little Tosh (always by the Captain's side)! **

**As Tosh sits glumly in her cell confined in UNIT for stealing information from the Ministry of Defence and building a sonic modulator. Time passes and Tosh dwells on her life so far.**

The Brains and the Beauty

Tosh sat uncomfortably, the rigid damp walls of her holding cell did not bring her any comfort and the cold damp atmosphere brought chill to her limbs. Her crimson red uniform was tattered and smeared with dirt. The edges of the sleeves were frayed and various holes appeared were the material had been pulled and worn away with age. The overall also kept a stiffness due to the cold and the sweat and grime of wearing it every day. Tosh crept smaller into the corner letting herself be swallowed whole by the oppressing atmosphere, the walls were closing in on her and she squatted glumly and pushed a few strands of hair neatly behind her ear, the silence was daunting and the thought of near death was terrifying.

Tosh's eyes shuttered closed and dreams of better times filled her head. Tosh thought of her mother and a timid tear crept down the side of her face. She remembered her smile and this simply brought joy to her heart and light to her soul. Sometimes a simple smile or expression held the most precious memories and was all one needed for comfort and reassurance. But the visions of a smile were not enough to scare away the dominating presence of death which lurked in the shadows of Tosh's cell. Tosh shuddered at the thought of Death crawling up her spine as she lay on the stone slab floor at mercy to Death itself.

The last image Tosh had in her mind of her mother was a face of agony, she had been screaming in pain. Her hands had been clutching her ears as a deafening noise had filled the room. Tosh could not wipe the memory from her mind. A frozen image of a woman in pain was on continuous pause in Tosh's mind and it bothered her. She was not sure if the image would ever play again, when she would be able to see her mother again. She was not even sure when the last time she saw her mother was. Time passed slowly in the cell; it was the absence of windows that disorientated a person as to what time it was. It could have been days or weeks that Tosh had been captivated in a stone walled closet. She may have not know how long she had been there but she definitely knew that Death had been there lurching after her every shuffle gliding on the shadowy corners of the cell; watching her waiting for her time to come!

Time seemed to tick by continuously but it was not the ticking of a clock rather the beating of a heart, the seconds left to live were fading fast and Tosh had lost count of them. Tosh had always been hard working and diligent, her mother had often praised of this. She had always set about making good use of her time. But now enclosed in a cell time escaped her and she felt life was worthless, she wasn't doing anything and the boredom began to tire her.

The darkness continued to dance across her mind and she began to fall into a state of loss, desperation to live drained all her energy. She began to live a life of dreams and not reality, she only continued to breathe in hope of not dying and that there would be an end to this misery and waiting. Tosh's belly growled in agitation and her mind whirled in anticipation of her coming death. Tosh shivered as the cold set in, her nose began to run and she smeared it across the dirty cuff of her overall and marked it wet. She began to sniffle and tears also began to flood from her eyes, sobs began to fill the silence but the presence of noise did not comfort Tosh as she was still alone. However the eerie presence of Death continued to frighten her and now the tears that marked her face began to cool she felt the unpleasant dampness again.

A robotic voice entered Tosh's ears "prepare for inspection!" and without light in her life, Tosh drearily dragged up the energy to stand up. She shuffled amble up the wall to gain full height from where she was previously crouched. She sighed with the effort. As the hefty stone door edged its way open a sharp I tense array of light lit the cell and with it, it brought new life. Tosh brought a hand up to her eyes to shade her face from the piercing light. But Tosh still managed to get a glimpse of a man, standing proudly in the doorway. A hero Tosh thought, like the ones in fairytales. However this man had an allaying sense of reality about him, he had seen Death many times and it had beaten him with torment. But Tosh knew he was her prince to save her from her torture. She wasn't sure what it was that made her feel this way but his body language conveyed it all.

The man was tall and had broad shoulders, he filled most of the door way. But it was not the strength that came from those shoulders rather the presence he had. His warmth had filled the cell right up to the deepest, darkest corners with hope. This made Death cower and Tosh could sense Death scuttling away hastily like a crab. The man straightened his World War Two coat and smoothed down its sleeves. He spoke with a reassuring voice and Tosh followed him into the light, like a dog at his heels as he said "Follow me!" As Tosh shuffled out of the cell she knew this man brought her new life and without him she would have fallen into Death's outstretched arms.


End file.
